Trim Your Electric Bill With these No-Cook Recipes

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Chocolate Peanut Butter Frozen Bars

Cost: $1.78, or $0.15 per serving

Dietician Brenda Ponichtera, the author of Quick and Healthy, makes a frozen treat that is both decadent and diet-friendly. Line a 9” by 13” pan with graham cracker squares. In a separate bowl, prepare two packages of chocolate pudding according to the package directions but using only three and one-third cups fat-free milk.  Beat in one-quarter cup peanut butter. Spread mixture on top of graham crackers and then top with another layer of crackers. Freeze for four hours, and then cut into squares.

Banana “Ice Cream”

Cost: $1.45, or $0.36 per serving

No ice cream maker necessary for this faux ice cream from Happy Herbivore blogger Lindsay Nixon. Just throw two frozen bananas into a food processor with a quarter-cup non-dairy milk plus a quarter-teaspoon each of vanilla extract and cinnamon. The chilled, blended banana mimics the texture of ice cream perfectly.

Tangy Watermelon Salad

Cost: $6.20, or $0.62 per serving

This recipe from Jill Ross of Gooseberry Patch is not your average fruit salad. Cube a watermelon (about 14 cups) and mix with one thinly sliced red onion. Set aside. In a small bowl, combine three-quarters cup orange juice, five tablespoons red wine vinegar, two and a half tablespoons honey, a tablespoon finely chopped green pepper, a half-teaspoon salt, a quarter-teaspoon pepper, a quarter-teaspoon garlic powder, a quarter teaspoon onion powder, a quarter-teaspoon dry mustard and three-quarters of a cup of oil. Pour dressing over watermelon and mix gently. Refrigerate for two hours.

Stuffed tomatoes

Cost: $1.80, or $0.90 per serving

Joan Jacobsen of Baby Boomer Way makes stuffed tomatoes by cutting the tops off two large, firm tomatoes and scooping out the insides. In a bowl, mix a 12-ounce can of tuna, a stalk of finely chopped celery, a quarter-cup of chopped red onion, half of a ripe avocado and the pulp of the tomatoes. Add the juices of half of a lemon and salt and pepper to taste. Mix all together with a fork, and then place into tomato shells. Chill, then serve.

Strawberry Mint Lassi

Cost: $3.65, or $0.91 per serving

“Mint, yogurt and ice work collectively as a trilogy of coolants,” says Gurapeet Bains, the author of Indian Superfood. Place in a blender nine ounces of hulled strawberries, a few fresh mint leaves, seven ounces plain yogurt, a large handful of ice and sugar to taste. Blend together until smooth.

Cold Cucumber Yogurt Soup

Cost: $3.71, or $0.93 per serving

Cumin and peperoncini and a kick to this cold soup recipe from Anne Maxfield of Accidental Locavore. Blend, chill, enjoy.

Watermelon Gazpacho

Cost: $12.55, or $1.25 per serving

For a refreshing cold soup, Chef Eric Gruber of Shore Lodge and Whitetail Club in McCall, Idaho, pairs a peeled, diced seedless watermelon with more savory fare. Blend the watermelon in a blender in batches with 10 diced Roma tomatoes, two diced red onions, two peeled, seeded and chopper cucumbers, two seeded and diced jalapenos, one seeded and diced poblano, two quarts of V8 vegetable juice, a quarter-cup lemon juice, a quarter-cup lime juice, a bunch of chopped cilantro, a tablespoon Tabasco sauce, a tablespoon sriracha sauce, a quarter-cup olive oil and salt and pepper to taste. Refrigerate overnight and then pass through a medium mesh strainer to remove any remaining chunks.

http://www.mint.com/blog/saving/cut-your-electric-bill-with-these-no-cook-recipes-082011/

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Six Things NOT to Say to Someone Who is Divorced

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By Amal Killawi and Zarinah Nadir

Divorce is never easy.

But it’s the reality for 50% of American couples and 31% of American Muslim couples.  With these statistics, you’re likely to have friends or know people in your community who have been divorced or are currently experiencing a divorce.

Divorce is often a time of monumental hardship and change. Many people do not know how to convey their sentiments when learning about a divorce.  Comments are usually well-intentioned, but can be grossly misplaced. In honor of our brothers and sisters who have experienced marriage dissolution or are currently in the process, we present a list of the top 6 things not to say to divorcees.  These statements are based on real-life experiences shared with us.

1. “Are you sure?”

Unless this question is posed by close family and friends or persons involved in the mediation process, it is highly inappropriate, offensive, and intrusive.  If people were unsure of their decision, they would not have shared the news with others.  Additionally, for some people, divorce may not have been their choice or decision to make.  People are likely to be under a great deal of emotional stress, and asking them about the uncertainty of their decision is disrespectful of their journey before separation.

2. “How long were you married?”  And upon finding out it was a relatively short period – “Oh, well, at least it was short.”

Marriage duration is not an accurate indicator of the value of the relationship, the length of the healing process, or the legitimacy of the marital experience. Whether the marriage lasted for 5 months or 5 years, it is important to acknowledge the significance of this loss.  The end of a marriage often also symbolizes the end of the dreams, aspirations, and life plans of the couple. Additionally, it is important to realize that regardless of the duration, some people may have suffered through distressing trials in their marriage.  The last few months could have been a living nightmare.

3. “I saw it coming all along.”

Since when has “I told you so” ever been a sensitive comment?  Unfortunately, some people use these opportunities to reveal their intuitiveness about a person’s marital problems.  Although they may consider it to be a statement of reassurance – that one should not be upset because the relationship seemed destined for divorce anyways – it is just plain rude and insensitive.

4. “Who filed for divorce? Did you go to court?  What did you get? Who has custody?”

For Muslims in the United States, divorce is often both a civil and religious process.  These processes can be lengthy and draining emotionally and financially.  Practice caution when asking questions about the divorce process.  Take the lead from the divorcee before entering into a conversation. If the person doesn’t share, don’t probe.  These are personal questions and may still be contentious.

5. “But you were such a perfect couple!”

Or any variation of this such as, “But he is such a nice brother!” or “She’s such a religious sister masha’Allah!”  There’s no such thing as a perfect couple or a perfect person.  It is important to remember that people’s public personas can be very different behind closed doors.  No matter how well we think we know others, there is nothing comparable to living with another person in a marital relationship.  Statements that pass judgment should be avoided because the reality is we do not know.

6. “May you get remarried soon!”

Not everyone who has experienced a divorce appreciates a du`a’ (prayer) for a speedy remarriage.  While prayers are important for a person going through hardship, keep in mind that certain prayers expressed during this time may not always be appropriate.  Some people do not wish to re-marry for some time.  Additionally, some divorces are as a result of traumatic experiences such as domestic abuse or infidelity, and divorcees may very well be fearful of re-experiencing this trauma in a future marriage.  It’s better to focus your du`a’ on helping them to adjust and move on, instead of praying for another marriage!

So then, what is appropriate etiquette?

  • Follow their lead.  Recognize that some people may want to talk, while others do not. Respect their preference.
  • Express empathy. Say, “I’m sorry about your divorce. How are you doing?”
  • Offer support and encouragement. Simply saying, “Please know that I’m here if you need anything” can go a long way.
  • Stay silent. If you don’t know what to say, silence is golden and acceptable.
  • Be sensitive to their needs. Make them feel included despite their change in marital status.
  • Honor their journey. Grief is generally a part of the healing process as people learn to adjust to life after separation.

Remember, you may encounter someone at any stage in that process. By practicing sincerity and utilizing common courtesy, we can be more mindful in our interactions with people undergoing a time of reflection and change.

50 Things You Need to Know About Marital Relationships

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Excerpted from Al Maghrib Institute’s “Fiqh of Love” seminar with Shaykh Waleed Basyouni

Great relationships don’t just happen; they are created. You have to work at it.
If your job takes all of your best energy, your marriage will suffer.
One of the greatest gifts you can give your spouse is your own happiness.
It is possible to love and hate someone at the same time.
When you complain about your spouse to your friends, remember that their feedback can be distorted.
The only rules in your marriage are those you both choose to agree with.
It is not conflict that destroys marriage; it is the cold, smoldering resentment that you hold for a long time.
It’s not what you’ve got, it’s what you do with what you have.
If you think you are too good for your spouse, think again.
Growing up in a happy household doesn’t ensure a happy marriage, or vice versa.
It’s never too late to repair damaged trust.
The real issue is usually not the one you are arguing about.
Love isn’t just a feeling; it is expressed through our actions.
Expectations set us up for disappointment and resentment.
Arguments cannot be avoided, but destructive arguments can be avoided.
One of the greatest gifts you can give your spouse is focused attention.
Even people with happy marriages sometimes worry that they married the wrong person.
Your spouse cannot rescue you from unhappiness, but they can help you rescue yourself.
The cost of a lie is far greater than any advantage you gain from speaking it.
Your opinion is not necessarily the truth.
Trust takes years to establish and moments to destroy.
Guilt-tripping won’t get you what you really want.
Don’t neglect your friends.
If you think, “You are not the person I married,” you are probably right.
Resisting the temptation to prove your point will win you a lot of points.
Generosity of spirit is the foundation of a good marriage.
If your spouse is being defensive, you might be giving them reasons to be like that.
Marriage isn’t 50/50; it’s 100/100.
You can pay now or pay later, but the later you pay, the more interest and penalties you acquire.
Marriage requires sacrifice, but your benefits outweigh your costs.
Forgiveness isn’t a one-time event; it’s a continuous process.
Accepting the challenges of marriage will shape you into a better person.
Creating a marriage is like launching a rocket: once it clears the pull of gravity, it takes much less energy to sustain the flight.
A successful marriage has more to do with how you deal with your current reality than with what you’ve experienced in the past.
Don’t keep feelings of gratitude to yourself.
There is no greater eloquence than the silence of real listening.
One of the greatest questions to ask your spouse is “How best can I love you?”
Marriage can stay fresh over time.
Assumptions are fine as long as you check them before acting upon them.
Intention may not be the only thing, but it is the most important thing.
Good sex won’t make your marriage, but it’ll help.
Privacy won’t hurt your marriage, but secrecy will.
Possessiveness and jealousy are born out of fear, not love.
Authenticity is contagious and habit-forming.
If your spouse thinks something is important, then it is.
Marriage never outgrows the need for romance.
The sparkle of a new relationship is always temporary.
There is violence in silence when it’s used as a weapon.
It’s better to focus on what you can do to make things right, then what your partner did to make things wrong.
If you think marriage counseling is too expensive, try divorce.

A Few Words…

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No Muslim who dies–whether they died a stealer, a liar, a fornicator, a murderer, an adulterer, a homosexual, a deceiver, a backbitter, etc–should have his/her death celebrated. Our mistakes are Allah’s to judge alone. We will have our own deeds to worry about on a Day where our own mothers will not recognize us. Instead, pray that the angels celebrate our arrival when it is our time to return to our Lord.

Bill Gates’ Speech: 11 Rules Your Kids Did Not & Will Not Learn in School

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Rule 1: Life is not fair – get used to it!

Rule 2: The world doesn’t care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3: You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won’t be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.

Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity.

Rule 6: If you mess up, it’s not your parents’ fault, so don’t whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren’t as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent’s generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.

Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they’ll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn’t bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that on your own time.

Rule 10: Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.

What Keeps Our Hearts Alive

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There seems to be much talk these days by people who know nothing about our Deen. They say how dhikr is bidah and not part of our beautiful Deen. So I’ve decided to post some evidence from the Qu’ran. I do not understand how you can live without dhikr. It is what keeps the heart alive, from inside and out. May Allah increase our knowledge and rid us of our ignorance. Ameen.

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Mention of Dhikr in the Qur’an

Dhikr is mentioned in many places in the Holy Qur’an, and in most verses, what was meant by the word dhikr is tasbih, glorifying; takbir, exalting; tahmid, praising; and praising and praying upon the Prophet (s).

Allah said in Surat al-Baqara, 152: “Remember Me and I will remember you.” [2:152]

He said in Surat ali cImran, 41, “…and remember your Lord much and glorify Him in the evening and in the early morning.” And again, 191, “Those who remember Allah while standing, sitting, and lying on their sides…” [3:41, 191]

He said in Surat al-Racd, 28, “Those who believe, and whose hearts find their rest in the remembrance of Allah–for, verily, in the remembrance of Allah hearts do find their rest.” [13:28]

And He said in Surat al-Ah zab, 35, “…and men who remember Allah much and women who remember Him…” And again, 41,42, “O you who believe! Remember Allah with much remembrance; and glorify Him morning and evening.” [33: 35, 41-42]

There are many, many other verses of Qur’an mentioning dhikr. Imam Nawawi said in his book, “Futahat ar-Rabbani cala-l- Adhkar an-Nawawiyya,” vol. 1, p. 106-109, “All scholars of Islam have agreed on the acceptance and permissibility of Dhikr by heart and by tongue, for the adult men and women, for children, for the one who has ablution, and for the one without ablution; even for the woman during her menses. Moreover, dhikr is allowed by all scholars in the form of tasbih, tahmid, takbir and praising and praying for the Prophet (s).”

Dhikr polishes the heart and is the source of the Divine breath that revives the dead spirits by filling them with the Blessings of Allah, decorating them with His Attributess, and bringing them from a state of heedlessness to the state of complete wakefulness. If we keep busy with Dhikrullah, happiness and peace will be granted to us. Dhikr is the key to happiness, the key to joy, and the key to Divine Love.